Flametide's World

Testing Patterns

2012-01-13T08:25:00.000-05:00

I'm sorry but it has been a very long time since I have posted. Due to health I have not been up to chatting much.
These days I have been testing patterns for others. If you need something tested please feel free to email me at Flametide@aol.com .
My dilemma right now is how to find out if Big Artes will ship to the US and if not how I can get some of there threads. The company is out of Brazil, I think.
When I am able I will post pictures here but if you would really like to see everything, I have been posting on my Facbook. You can locate me at http://www.facebook.com/Flametide .
Please feel free to add me, If there is something you like email me.
I shall head out as I have a skirt to get finished. Miss you all
Gayle

Can't Knock Me Down

2011-07-14T04:52:00.002-04:00

Over whelming health issues.... I am still here fighting crocheting away. It is my sanity. I have neglected my blog for Facebook. Everything I have crocheted has been posted there.. Yes I should be posting my items here to but it is so easy over there. .

Here are a few things I have been making lately.

Hat crazy!!

Updated Flickr

2010-10-27T13:38:00.001-04:00

I have been very busy lately Testing patterns for a very nice lady and when I am not doing that I have been trying to get a few things made here that I want to Etsy. You can see all my items that are finished on Flickr or join me as Facebook : Gayle Aikens

talk to you all Soon

Hexagon Baby Sweater

2010-08-27T19:48:00.002-04:00

I have seen this sweater created in the US and Over Seas. Both patterns equally beautiful. I took a little of each and put my hand in it. This is my version of the sweater. I hope you like it.

Testing Patterns for SmoothFox

2010-08-02T12:52:00.002-04:00

I replied to an open add for testers and was lucky enough to be picked. Here are the 2 blocks that I made. These both belong to http://smoothfoxlover.blogspot.com/ .

She has wonderful free patterns and some that you can purchase. I know as I have bought a few. That is how I originally found this little slice of heaven. I can tell you, for those who know me, they will vouch I never liked squares. I DO NOW!! Thanks Donna You have officially converted me to a square junkie !!

Visit With Grandson

2010-06-24T13:56:00.002-04:00

I miss him so much. He is still in foster care. Today was my first visit and it has been 3 months since I saw my precious little man. He has gotten so big. I just had to share a little video of him with you

Oval Headphone Replacement Covers

2010-04-12T15:05:00.005-04:00

I was in need for covers for a set of headphones and could not find a pattern anywhere so I decided to try my hand at writing one.

Oval Headphone Replacement Covers

Size E Hook

I used Sport Weight yarn, but you can use 4 ply Baby Soft. Any lightweight yarn will work. The Idea is to be able to hear as well as have comfort

Note: chain 2 counts as a double crochet

1. Chain 20 , slip stitch to form a ring

2. Chain 1, sc around , slip stitch into chain 1 (20sc)

3. Chain 2, double crochet in chain 2 space, *back post* double crochet in next 6 single crochet, 2 double crochet in next, 1 double crochet in next, 2 double crochet in next, 1 double crochet in next, 2 double crochet in next, 1 double crochet in next, 2 double crochet in next, double crochet in next 7 single crochet, slip stitch into chain 2.

4. Chain 1, single chain around in both loops, slip stitch into chain 1.

5. Chain 2, double chain in chain 2 space *back post* double crochet in next 11 single chains, 2 double crochet in next, 1 double crochet in next, 2 double crochet in next, 1 double crochet in next, 2 double crochet in next, double chain in next 9 single chains, slip stitch into chain 2.

6. Chain 1, single chain in next 5 stitches, decreases 1 time, single chain in next 5, decrease 1 time, single chain in next 5, decrease 1 time,single chain in next 5, decrease 1, single chain in next 2.

Fasten of. Weave in loose threads.

created by Gayle Aikens (flametide@aol.com)4/2010

Behind the lines: Killer Unseen

2010-02-21T05:17:00.004-05:00

I am truly sorry that I have not written in such a long time. The best way to describe it , would be unwell. For almost 5 months now there has been a silent monster living in the midst of our household. It has been attacking me slowly killing me.

I can hear you say " what does she mean Killing her?" I have been diagnosed with pseudo seizes.They are not like epileptic seizures. They do not attack the brain like those do. Pseudo's are related to long term stress ie: post traumatic syndrome, sexual abuse, mental abuse, physical abuse, beatings, drug abuse.

Those are just a few to name, of course those are of course the top layers of what I have been through over the years. I have been walked on by my children and other family members and currently still am. It has been explained to them all that if this doesnt all stop and disappear I will simply fade away into dust. They didnt show a hint or tinge of concern and went right back to bickering.

Joe has been a help mate, since it has begun. I am not allowed to drive he has been taking me everywhere. Ron cared enough to send me on a retreat for 6 day which meant another cruise for me. It was cold and damp. YUCK. But I did get away.

Now if only I would/ could get away again for a little while longer. I really need it. Bad

Last night was one of the worst of my seizures. In my opinion I would say it was THE worst.

GAYLE

A Little of This and That

2010-01-14T15:43:00.003-05:00

Therapy as it is called these days has brought me to my newest creations. Enjoy and as always they are for sale.

Few More Items

2009-12-22T11:33:00.000-05:00

Been Busy Crocheting

2009-12-22T11:29:00.002-05:00

As you can see I have been very busy making items. Though they seem random, I enjoyed making each of them. I have a couple more pictures to add and will do so shortly. Thanks for looking .

Dear Angelina

2009-12-04T10:07:00.002-05:00

It seems like endless time has passed since the day I carried you home. Now you have become a mother yourself carrying a son into this world. How proud of you I am, but you never heard me say it. How beautiful you have become, but you never listened. Now you have run , run from what we tried to call a home into a vicious world, unprotected from the realities of life.

I have sunk into a depression since you left, a dark desolate hole. Deep where no one would be able to reach me. Closed off from the world I decided it would be better for me to remain aloof then to actually rejoice in the life you have given or the spirit of you spreading your wings.

It is now almost 2 months past and my heart still aches, I wish daily that you would come home. Yet part of me knows that you should not. It is "Your" time now not mine. Make your choices well dear daughter, live, love and laugh often. Bless the little boy you have and tell him constantly that you love him. He is a precious gift!

No matter who or what becomes of his father .. makes no difference to me. Your son Mally is a joy in my eyes as are you and I Love you both. Just listen when it is said and never forget the good things in life.

I woke up this morning and I had to write this to you, here for all to see. It is a formation of my love to you so you will always remember, and can always come back when you forget.

Now I lift my head from tear laden eyes and start a new day with hope. Hope that for myself it to will be a new life filled with joy and triumphs and love.

With all my heart,

I Love You,

Mom

Been A While But Not Forgotten

2009-10-27T20:45:00.003-04:00

So much has happened since I last wrote to you. Like time had warped and just a couple weeks passed we woke up. Joe, Jennifer, AJ and I took a 5 day cruise. It took us to Cayman Islands and Cozumel. I would say that for the over all we had a really great time. Hardest part of the trip was the drive up and back. This occured Oct 9-17th.

Angel went into labor around 4:16 am on the 22nd, or what was thought to be. The doctor put her on Morphine and planned on doing some tests in the morning. Well that did not happen as he had planned. She retched,broke her water and out came baby at 9:25 am. He was named Malakai Anthony weighing in at 7.4 pounds, 19 inches long.

I guess that would be everything all wrapped in a nutshell. I will be posting pictures for you to see as they are taken.

Something to Say About Ignorance.....

2009-07-21T08:01:00.002-04:00

A pondering thought for you to chew on... It has been almost a year that we have lived in this house. Our fence, rotted from weather, was partially taken down. We had not decided when to put one up. Ron down from injuries, no income from Joe... you understand.. there just has not been extra cash to put up another fence. Our neighbors, bought 6 panels and we thought well that was nice of them to help out. Boy were we wrong! They dug out several holes off our posts, did not cement them in and started to hammer the fence up. It has one panel partially stained dark brown. Of course this is the first one that is closest to the street and facing our house. I went out and told the gentleman he would use out posts to put the fence up. He told me our posts were no good for them. Mind you , our posts are cemented in and are sturdy. Anyhow, Joe, Aj and Ron somehow managed to tear down what was left of our rotted fence that was covered with poison oak/ivy. Aj has been nursing a mild case of poison oak. My neighbors who are Mexican and do not like "white" people ripped all the fence they had surrounding the rest of their house down just to fence OUR line . This morning at 6 am we were awoken to pounding. Can you believe it 6 am!! I opened the door and said "must you!". They continued for an hour making sure we were all awake, then stopped. They have about 4 more panels to put up. I suspect they will wake us up again tomorrow to finish the job just to be ignorant. By the way, they have not cemented the posts and the fence is old and uneven. It looks awful. I will get pictures of it to show you.

It's Been a While

2009-07-09T17:40:00.002-04:00

Long gone but not forgotten, I have not really been here yet I have been. Does that make any sense? I spend a lot of time playing that game still " Mobsters " , I am rather good at it. It takes from the everyday stress and channels it in other directions.
I have seen a couple doctors since I last wrote. I have ovarian dysfunction, am a high risk for breast cancer and have also been tested for cervical cancer. On top of that I need to have surgery for a damaged nerve in the groin area. This came from a drain tube that was inserted for 5 weeks when I had my tummy tuck in 06. Oh I am sooo looking forward to that. Still go through the everyday aches and pains and anxiety. I have been waiting for a call back for the past couple days from one doctor on a medication change. So ... this is what is happening..
Jen has been away for about 3 weeks. We are picking her up on Sunday, then she leaves again next week till the second week of Aug. ..Everyone else has been here doing the same ole stuff just a different day..
I am off to tend to my 5 ft tomato plants now. Have a good night everyone!

There is a Upbeat to Any Downside

2009-06-16T12:32:00.004-04:00

It has been a while since I have posted. I am sorry. There have been a few things going on with myself as always that have kept me away. For one I got caught up with a game, another has been a drastic medication change and of course summer.

Now as for the medication.... The pain doctor, he is the one who has been giving me injections every 2 weeks in the groin area for nerve damage. After several months he had decided to place me on 2 medications. I have had known reactions to 1 and the other way to make me sleep more. The combination with these and my other medications that I usually take gave me a "drunk" effect. I spent several days on the couch and when I did walk it was more of a stumble. No driving, cooking or anything else. Just the couch.

My Psych doctor put me on an anxiety medication and another for depression at the same time as the pain doctors medication trial. Bad timing on their part. Either way it didn't go over well. Nothing worked right and it was ALL stopped. So I am back to what I was on in the beginning. I feel better that way. I still have nerve pain and anxiety but they are maintained by pain medication and a anxiety pill. OK so on we move.

As for summer, the younger kids have been busy with their own friends, hanging out, skateboarding.. helping out around here... We have also been fishing on nice days A LOT. Catching hardly anything to speak of mind you. But I do have a nice tan! Ron splurged and we have Six Flags season tickets and we have gone once already. Yep they are costly, not the tickets but the park itself. Sheesh.

Now I have a couple of pictures to share.. These are of my tomato garden. It had started off small and sort of BLEW UP. I mean really look at it. We planted only less then 2 months ago and my plants are almost as tall as I am. I also have loads of tomato's already growing. Somewhere in the mass's there are also peppers growing. Yes I am proud of my babies. I really can not wait till it is time to pick and eat some of what I grew. And no, I don't let anyone here at home tinker with my plants. It is my Green thumb that has created this magical mass. Mine and Gods hands. Aren't they amazing?

Where did she go??

2009-05-28T15:33:00.002-04:00

I have disappeared, yep that's right! For several reasons I have sort of taken a sabbatical from my own reality. With my stress levels hitting way off the charts and medication malfunctions who could blame me. So I put down the crochet hooks and closed up the sewing machine again. I have fallin into what is known as MYSPACE HELL. There is a game there that I was introduced to called "Mobsters" I guess you could say it is interesting, no it is addictive. I have been entranced by it and so, that is where you will find me. myspace.com/flametide
Feel free to drop in but be warned it is one of those games that you will get hooked on. I did at least.... for now

Flower Scrubbies Revised

2009-05-25T14:20:00.003-04:00

It has come to my attention that the original scrubbies I had made did not work so well in the kitchen. So I made a new batch bigger and thicker. Here is what I have now. It is 2 sided. One side is cotton and the other is nylon for pots.

Pet Exchange

2009-05-17T18:20:00.002-04:00

Here is something I made to send for to my partner for our pet exchange..She has a small dog. It is a blanket and 2 scarves.

Baby Baby Baby

2009-05-17T18:14:00.004-04:00

I am on a baby kick these days. With my daughter pregnant, I have been working away at different items. She is having a boy, but that doesn't keep me from making all these cute little items. Here are a few of my latest creations.

It's All About ME

2009-05-14T12:02:00.003-04:00

Some of you have asked who I am, the lady behind the words. Have I changed much over the years. Yes actually I have, mentally and physically. These pictures are the most recent, taken in March while on my cruise. I would say they are the best as I was the most relaxed.

Come and Gone

2009-05-12T21:21:00.002-04:00

Another day has come to a close and for the most part it has been a quiet one. I did some wash since the sun was shinning today. Weather man says that we are going to get rain for the next couple of days. Ran Angel on a couple errand with the Scooter. Gas prices rose to 2.39 a gallon. Right now I am searching for a crochet pattern. It is for a baby dress with matching booties. I have not found as of yet. Also watching the Travel channel and then off to bed to do it all again tomorrow.
I mailed out a few goodies today and a surprise to someone special. I can't wait till the mailman delivers it all. I look forward to the responses.
There are a few new patterns posted on the blog today for you all to enjoy. As I stumble on those that strike my fancy, I shall post those too.
In the mean time, have a great night

Pot Holder

2009-05-12T16:13:00.007-04:00

Croche Mantas / Afghan Pattern Crochet

2009-05-12T16:06:00.000-04:00

Baby Booties Pattern / Croche Bebe

2009-05-12T16:03:00.001-04:00

2009-05-11T08:46:00.002-04:00

Once again it seems that while mulling over another issue in life, I have come to notice?, no not notice. I have known already that I have been depressed for a while. It just well lately has been on the surface. So much has been happening around me that I have been sucked into it. I didn't want my 18 yr old pregnant daughter to move out. Now she wants to move to another state entirely ( this makes me very sad because I know I will never see her again). I didn't ask to have our income limited due to Ron being injured at work and him having to have 2 surgeries that had him laid up till mid June. I didn't ask for Joe's son to constantly remind us how he dislikes helping out around the house knowing that his father can not support him and we are trying the best we can to do so.(He is not even kin). It is not entirely my fault that Joe and I are talking about going our seprate ways. It is not my fault that Joe is diabetic. It is not my fault that Joe has no income either. Sometimes I just feel like everything I do is nothing. I can create something from a piece of string and it matters not. I can sew a little and that matters not. My house is always clean, that matters not. If I can not fix everyone else's issues then I am a failure.

I stop here every day and see all the wonderful places from the people who come and read my blog. I am amazed by the traffic I get. I figure this blog is getting to depressing for most. I would think so. If only I had something good to report out. The sun is shining this morning. Yes that is a good thing. My cat is watching the bird teasing him by the window. It is about 9 am and it is quiet with the exception of the weather channel.
I do have something else to add. I never knew that if you wanted to have a friend that you had to have a good credit report. Or at least maybe a Swiss bank account. Maybe a Bently or something in those lines. I have only people I talk to online and one friend localy that I talk to. He doesn't require a credit report. It would have been nice to have a "girlfriend".. I guess I am hurt. No I am very hurt, all I can say is you shouldn't listen to him. Money doesn't make the person. Life does and I miss you !
I can't blog anymore right now......

Bag Crazy

2009-05-10T19:30:00.002-04:00

What I did for Mothers Day was make more bags. As you can see in the picture I have been busy today. Some are for the Raffle the others will get good use when I go food shopping.

Flower Power Scrubbies Give Away

2009-05-07T17:43:00.004-04:00

With to much time on my hands, thanks to not feeling well. I have something else to offer everyone. Personally I would love people from around the world to join in and sign up for these. They are kitchen scrubbers made from nylon and cotton. Lightweight and machine washable. Once you get one, let me know how they work, do they hold up well and for how long. I could use some feedback on these. So who wants to test them out for me?

Drop me a comment and please leave me your email address so I can write you for your personal address later on. This will be the only way I can contact you. I really do look forward to hearing from you.

Remeber I need your email address in the comment box or I can not contact you. This is very important all. Thanks bunches

Baby Sweater Therapy

2009-05-06T16:13:00.002-04:00

Here are a few of the sweaters I have been working on these few days past. These are newborn to 3 months in size and of course can be made to order.

Freebie Reusable Grocery Bag!! Ends May 31st

2009-05-06T08:53:00.004-04:00

Come on everyone. Let's get the Grocery Bag Raffle going!! These are wonderful and can hold anything you would like to carry. So leave a comment with your email address and hope you win one!!
You know at the same time we are doing something good for our mother Earth. It will be one less plastic bag that will be used.
I look forward to hearing from you !!!

Free Reusable Grocery Bag Giveaway

2009-05-03T19:56:00.006-04:00

I have been promising to get these bags up on my Blog now for a while and here they are! I have 6 so far to raffle . I will be taking comments from you all for the month of May and then randomly choose 6 people to send the bags off to. Please make sure when you post a comment that you leave me an email address so that if you win I can email you . I will not be able to notify you otherwise. Remember email info in your comment so that I can email the winner. This is very important all. Thank you all for stopping in. Lets do our part to save our planet, one grocery bag at a time! By The Way, I would like to thank the Green Bag Lady for the great pattern she created. If it wasn't for her I would not be able to make these bags for you .

Gayle

Close Call.....

2009-05-03T19:18:00.002-04:00

Adrift in sleep this morning, it was broken by the thrashing of Joe's body. His sugar I tested was 24. This is very low and he is a diabetic. His body was covered with a cold sweat, barely conscious he was convulsing. This caused me to wake up and grab his glucose meter to test him to find out why. When I saw it was 24 I ran down to get Aj and some orange juice. We were unable to get Joe to drink with out wearing it. Thus I had to inject Joe with a special syringe made for low sugar. It brought him back to a conscious state so we could get him to drink the juice and level his sugar out. The entire day was a stop and go day with Joe. His sugar shot over 500 around lunch time making him tired and droopy. We managed to get it back down but insisted on a nap. It is now around 7:30 pm and he is feeling more like himself. Joe will be talking to his doctor on Monday about his insulin and having it adjusted again. He really should have been on the hospital if it were not for Aj and I . Close call, to close for comfort.

A Bit Behind

2009-05-02T16:41:00.002-04:00

It seems that I am falling behind a little now. For the past 4 days I have been sitting with a low fever of 99.6 It seems to come and go but has me very worn out. Yep you can definitely say that I have not been feeling like myself these days. I saw one of my doctors Thursday and my blood pressure was 143/ 82, His nurse made me stay at the office for an hour on a "time out" as she called it.
I managed to sew 6 grocery bags that I will be posting to the Blog as a give away. I just need to get them photographed and set up the raffle. I also have been crocheting and made several baby sweaters. I will be posting pictures of these as well. Like I said I have had no energy to get off the couch. The guys are harping on me to get more rest. I feel like I am faking, I mean well I am so used to "doing " everything and always being on the go that sitting for a long period makes me feel like I am doing something wrong. At least I am crocheting so that is good.
Today Joe is finally working on an outlet for me. He is putting one in by my sewing table. No more extension cords. Ron has been sleeping most of the day. His shoulder has been bugging him. Aj ran off to skate board and Jen is hanging out with her friends. It has been quiet here for the most part. My "worry" meter is low today for a change. Keep up cause I would hate for you to miss the Grocery bag give away.
ttfn

Right Out The Window

2009-04-29T10:21:00.003-04:00

Last night was horrible, Joe and I were fighting, Aj has not been listening and Ron has had enough. Ron has set down the law of his house and told Aj he is on probation. He has 1 month to start respecting his father and the rest of us, listening to what he is told and complaining less. If he does not then he is not allowed to live here anymore. This now leaves Joe with choices that he has to make. Move out, give Aj to his mother or foster him, or ask his parents to take him again for a while. I have no idea what is happening all I know is that my blood pressure is way to high, I am now anemic and constantly tired. Not to mention stressed to the max and with it all very cranky. So here I am in the waiting game hoping that AJ realizes that reality is hitting him in the face and it is time to wake up.
What's next?I have no idea. I can say that my car is being fixed, less a bill or 2 but we need to get to all the doctor appointments the 3 adults have. Ron is healing, Joe is playing computer games most of the time and I am fighting to stay awake lately. Such a dull life we lead. Suggestions are always welcome. To be honest we could really use a few! It seems for each step we move forward we fall back 4.
Oh, just an FYI. Jen my 14 yr old is not exempt from the punishments. Her father has taken her tv and reminded her that her life is pretty good and can get simplified, Ie: no tv, mp3 player, psp, going out with friends and overnights. He may not be able to tell her that she has to move but he can make living at home hard. With AJ, he wants him to learn that if it wasn't for Him(Ron and I) that life would be very difficult for himself and dad right now. especially with no family backing. We just want to be appreciated and respected. Ok so enough complaining on my part. I have cut out 20 grocery bags that I am hoping to sew with the intention to raffle off a few on here. You know GO GREEN!
ttfn

Lost and Found

2009-04-27T17:46:00.002-04:00

Today was the day Ron had his surgery. For those of you who did not know about this it was for a rotary cup tear. When the Doctor opened up his shoulder he discovered that the tear was not as bad as he originally figured. Thank God for little miracles. Ron has been patched up and hopefully now will be back to work in about 7 weeks. We brought him home and with little complaint he is nursing his wound. Of course the pain medication is working wonders for him too.
It must be a good day as I got in touch with someone I have missed since my cruise in March, Pam. I really have missed speaking with her. We have been writing back and forth via email, but at her end she has been super busy and doesn't get to respond as often as I "live" online. The phone time made my day. We hit it off so well on the ship that I would hate to loose her friendship even as new as it is. Personally I can not wait till we get to see each other again. Can ya tell how much I miss her? I never had a friend before like her, well beside Joe but that doesn't count cause he shares my bed. Don't get me wrong I have met and chatted with others and know several people but there is something about Pam that I can not explain. Like a sister you never met but know from the heart. She just belongs.

Hardships and Then Some

2009-04-24T08:49:00.002-04:00

My 18 yr old moved out 2 days ago and with her went her income. So no more help there. We knew eventually the day would come but we also had expected that Joe's Social Security would sort of pivot out the expenses. It never came. So now my meager income is footing the bill. Ron is out of work for the next 5 1/2 months due to an injury and after that we have no idea what happens. So who is paying the bills? I am paying the mortgage and that's about it!
It just so happens my blood pressure has been high and the doctor is concerned that I will collapse from it. Right now it is not treatable as "High" blood pressure. But it does cause reason to watch. Even my mother is worried about it. I have daily chest pain and a head ache from it. But then what does it matter. It is not like anyone else is going to change things here. Or like they can. My mood is depressed and sour. I don't want to do anything and find no joy in my surroundings. I think it is more like we can not afford to do anything so why bother and that is depressing enough.
Once again everyone sits on the couch or on the computers because we really have no clue how to make things "happen". We owe money and can not pay it, we can not make these debts go away, so as the days move on things happen and grow. Oh I forgot to mention my check engine light is back on and my car needs to be worked on again. Who can afford that? Shit! We really need some relief here. This on going saga seems to never end and there is never any help outside these walls. Eventually one of us is going to fall over from the stress of this house. We have grown to hate it here. Not one of us likes it anymore. We would gladly give up this house and this state for a better place, a better life and a stress free enviorment.
When you wake up and what should be beauty of life turns into a nightmare of where is the "Money" to survive. It becomes a terrible shame. Our lives have lowered to a level of finacial hell. The word Love has been strained by money, bills and the lack of. Our faith is tested daily and it is very hard to hold on to what you truely believe in. Especially when you have little to nothing to work with.

My First Adventure

2009-04-22T15:16:00.002-04:00

This is my first trip around the block on a motorcycle. I did it. Can you say beaming with pride! Joe took this picture for you to see. Until the next lesson, and more pictures Toodles

Just Plain Yuck

2009-04-21T12:14:00.002-04:00

I think the title says it all. Our weather here sucks today. Cold and rainy. I have hopes that tomorrow is better, at least weather wise. Joe had his heart tests done yesterday and so far so good. That means the cruise is a go. Ok so there is something good in the yuck of things. I managed to tear something in my groin... AGAIN. this really sucks. Every time I try to do something, lift something... I am in pain. Upside of it, I have lost so far 6 pounds. Ok so another good thing has happened. Might have to changed the title by the time I am finished posting.
Monday Ron has surgery on his shoulder. His recovery will take 5 months. That is 5 months home, no work and making me buggy. But that is ok, I am used to it.
Angel's babies daddy came back from California today. Lord help us! Angel is like living in HELL. Her mood swings are so wide it is like being on a sail boat during a hurricane and the mast swinging freely knocking your ass off the boat. Hang on Fellas your going in!!! Perhaps there is hope that this boy will own up and get a job and be a daddy? Ok who am I kidding?
Soooo.. for now I am stuck on the couch, watching tv and computing. Later I will crochet, surf and cook super. ttfn

A Ride To Heaven

2009-04-18T21:04:00.002-04:00

I was not going to post this yet as a picture wasn't taken. It was sort of an after thought on our part. So this is the skinney of things. Today Joe handed over the key to his motorcycle and I started to learn how to ride it. Yep that's right all. I did it. I made it to second gear on our side street. It isn't long enough to go any faster so I did what I could. Joe said I did great for my first time out. I am soooo thrilled. I had a blast. He said next time he will take pictures of me riding so that I can use them for the blog. Until tomorrow...Have a good night!

Pot Holder Pattern

2009-04-15T19:53:00.002-04:00

Floor Rug of a Different Nature

2009-04-15T19:48:00.001-04:00

Blog Surfing

2009-04-15T13:59:00.002-04:00

I am thoroughly burnt out. After hours of combing through others Blogs I am pooped. I love crochet patterns from other countries and have if you notice below, saved the Blogs. You are welcome to check them out as there are many wonderful patterns. But I warn you they are not in English. Once my mind can absorb again I will be back surfing once more. In the mean time I am off to take a break. Take care.. Oh here is a little something for you to enjoy

Another Insane Day In The Nut House

2009-04-14T20:00:00.002-04:00

Angel is making us all crazy!! Beside the fact that she listens to nothing we say , the baby's daddy who is in California cause he ran off for another woman, calls here to tell her she is with another boy. Of course she was, walking with her sibling to the store. I tell you something better give or I am going to strangle someone. I am sick of her pregnancy, sick of her, sick of all the bull shit that is going on around here and just want it all to go away already. You would think that we could just be happy and enjoy the little things in life, well not with her drama. Go get me this, shut up, I want that, I am tired, there is nothing to do. Why dont you buy more food. I have nothing to wear.. It goes on and on and on. And that is just Angel.
I have 2 more children that have their days and at least they are young enough to understand the words grounded. Life is not hard enough on us as adults trying to support them, Making ends meat with what little we have? Can they not cut us some slack? Have words of wisdom please feel free to spread some our way....

2009-04-13T10:50:00.002-04:00

It's Monday and of course it is raining. I can not imagine where the warmer weather is. Isn't suppose to be spring? It makes for a blah mood. Lately there has been a lot of blah going around my house. The adult had a good long discussion and decided that we had to get it together and heal the issues at hand. We are in what is called a "waiting game" . With that in mind you can not really set a mood because you have no idea really how to think on things. I am almost finished crocheting another baby blanket, this one for a girl. It is very colorful and yes pictures will come once it is finished. Once the rain passed. Say by Thursday, we are going to plant some tomato's. Joe set up a bed for the plants away from the dog. It really is the little things that are hitting home these days. If not for them I would totally loose it. . I am off for some coffee but will be back in a little while to post some more

Scooter or Not to Scooter

2009-04-11T18:16:00.003-04:00

I never got a chance to show you my toys. Pretty pink Petunia, my lovely Italian scooter and then the red scooter that my family likes to play with. This will be the first year we get to really enjoy them. In Indiana you do not need anything special to get them on the road. IE: license plate, insurance, drivers license.. Just the desire for the open road. You just can't take them on the highways.

Coming of New

2009-04-11T17:53:00.002-04:00

In the mess of my life there is a new addition that will be coming sometime near the begining of Nov 2009. We are not sure if it is a boy or a girl yet. Still this is the first I have crocheted, it is for a boy. Perhaps I have set the tone for the future? My daughter is playing with the name Malachi and has none yet for a girl. Hope you like what I have made

You Have Got to Hear This One

2009-04-10T09:57:00.002-04:00

Joe wrote to his parents for advice on his current situation. Financial and mental. I had written earlier about my husband supporting him and his son. The state gives him a piddle of cash so that he can have something which is about $200. Not enough to live on by any means. He got a response from his father. I guess the general comment was to get a job. Now in most cases you and I would say Sure Joe that sounds good. go get a job. But Joe has been released from work for a couple years due to medical reasons and poor health and is fighting for SSI/SSD. He is on the cusp of it all now.
With no income and a son and X wife. She can surface and fight to take the boy. Might not win because of her mental health but then the state would take Joe's son and foster him. Now think on this. My husband is saving Joe and his son a lot of grief. Joe is and has asked for just a little help. some relief from the rest of us. He gets nothing. no response. His family is 5 times the size of mine and not a finger. Ok his sister has helped us. She did a major part in the purchase of our house. But we are really stuck again. Now what. Joe needs something steady on a month to month till his SSI/SSD rolls in. AJ needs clothing Joe needs shoes. Its the little things that are missing because we cant do it. Joe can not offer me a little something as a trinket of love. He has empty hands. When does Love take over or fail when your income can't maintain your life? Can anyone answer this question? please feel free to respond

Curious

2009-04-08T16:39:00.002-04:00

So if I was to say I was interested in say maybe selling a kidney.... what would I have to do? I mean I have 2 and they work really well. I figure someone out here could use one and we need the money really bad. It would be a win win situation... think about it

Gayle

Obligated or Not

2009-04-08T14:19:00.002-04:00

I have several issues to address. First of all Joe and AJ. Joe was denied his income once again and my separated spouse is supporting him and AJ his son. Is that proper? Is it fair? Should I allow it? Is love that binds that thick and if it is should I not be with my husband then? Who suffers the most with all of this?
We are all suffering here again. Ron was injured at work and living on 60% income supporting us ALL. Angel is pregnant and doesn't know if she is coming or going. Her income is the same way up in the air.
My car is on it's way out again. The transmission is slipping. We need $1600 to fix it and don't have it. No there is no way to back out of the trip we prepaid. It is NON REFUNDABLE. So don't bring it up. I am stuck. Joe is Stuck. Our relationship is in hell or virtually non existent at this point. We are trying but money looms over everything we do these days.
Angel is not making things any easier on us. I want this gimmie that. I am going to be 18 so gimme gimme. That's all we hear these days.
On the flip side, I had 7 teeth drilled on yesterday so I can eat with out pain. I am in pain anyways from the twisting of my jaw and lips. Maybe tomorrow I will feel like eating. Not today. Seriously I wish there was something better to post to anyone who reads this. I have nothing left to give, sell or bleed out. I am empty and broke. My bills are paid and that's about it. No luxuries available for the summer. Note with out the car we will not be able to get to the cruise either. Keep that in mind. A total loss of the money paid for a little something for almost everyone
With this mouthfull I will close for now....

Newest Creation

2009-04-04T18:55:00.002-04:00

I have been in this awful funk when it comes to crochet. Perhaps I have broken that and am on a roll now. I just finished this top. Made with out a pattern it is all my own. I believe I can modify it for another if wanted. I would seriously have to try. I can tell you I used an F hook for the cups and a G hook for the body. It is all cotton and feels really nice on the skin. Shame I sold off my cotton else I would be making more for the summer. Hope you like looking at it as much as I will like wearing it.
I am really proud of myself on this one!

Fallen off the Branch

2009-03-31T15:57:00.004-04:00

I got off the couch, if only for a little while. This morning I had to go for nerve injections. Meaning they numb the nerves so they will not cause pain. Fun! Angel , my soon to be 18 and totally irresponsible daughter had to get blood work. Her doctor wants to see how pregnant she really is. If only she wasn't... Tomorrow I am going to play taxi for her so I know she goes to see the doctor. I am not pleased. I have my own agenda to follow tomorrow and it's a long day coming.
I managed to crochet a couple items. 2 bathing suit tops. I am thinking about adding material to them and making summer tops that can be used more often. Pictures will comes eventually.
I got an email today from Pam, she is a wonderful lady that I met on the cruise. Honestly I was thrilled. It is nice to make a friend. I envy her for working in the Corporate world, where as I am the happy homemaker. It has been years since I worked, I miss it sometimes. I miss the money more. You could say the being around people and having my days filled ... I miss that. Here I have Joe and Ron oh and the kids. Days drift in and out endlessly . Yes they are long and usually dull. I count down the days till our Cruise in Oct. Mentally I need to get away. I am tired... of nothing. so with that thought I am going to find something to make for supper. Have any ideas.. send them on. I am always looking for something new.

Journalistic Dead End

2009-03-30T20:42:00.002-04:00

It has come to my attention that the writing skills I once possessed have somehow died off. When I go back into my blog, I have seen and am ashamed how my words have come to fail me. My life is as dull as my words have become. Less meaning and the zest for life missing. Will it come back? This I can not say.
As for life, I am dealing with several issues that have been bothering me. One the lack of crochet that I am doing. I believe this has to do with the dying out of my home life. We spend so much time sitting on our asses during the day, that it seems a waste to even wake up. No zeal it's gone. As a whole we have become a lazy boring bunch. Tsk, such a shame.
Until I can get my arse off the couch..ttfn

The Skinny of Things

2009-03-24T12:54:00.002-04:00

Another day is here and of course it is far from dull. Joe recieved an answer to his Social Security and it was a big fat NO. He went to appeal it first thing. So now he waits again. Hopefully it wont be over a year like the last time. Angel is still using the fact that at 17 and being pregnant is a great excuse to do nothing. She also has it in her head that what belongs to everyone else it hers too. Jen is all about boys and at 14 doesn't bode for anything good. AJ he needs to learn to stop flapping his lips. If the kids would melow out things might be tolerable.
I am trying to get the guys to give up our dog and one of the cats. Due to bills and overhead I think it would be a smart idea. Hopefully someone will see that.
Oh and still counting down the days till our next vacation. At this point it is all that keeps me moving these days. Medication change came to. I guess I had a reaction to one pill that gave me restless legs in the day time hours. Will see what happens now.
I am off to check my auctions .. Toodles for now

The Waiting Game...

2009-03-20T12:02:00.002-04:00

How do you make 204 days move faster? I am sitting here crawling out of my skin with anticipation . Yep another cruise is awaiting us Oct 10th. This time as a family we will be going. It is our birthday presents to Joe, AJ and Jen.
My biggest stressor is raising money for the vacation part. I am selling alot of my craft magazines and books as well as yarn on my Ebay store. Please feel free to help a fellow crafter out. I am still crocheting to order but not just randomly making things these days.
But how to make the days move quicker.
I also have over 100 pounds of material that I am selling. Mostly cotton blends. Asking $75.00 for ALL of it. If you know someone who might be interested email me at Flametide@aol.com and put Material in the subject line. I can ship it anywhere in the US . Let me know.. I am off to auction land to add more items.
Toodles.

Formal Night on Cruise

2009-03-18T16:57:00.003-04:00

Thanks to Pam ( Our new friend) , we have this picture to share. It is from the first formal night dinner on the cruise. It is also the one and only picture I have of Joe in a suit . Neat isn't it!!

Fat Bottom Bag

2009-03-18T16:55:00.000-04:00

Here is a nice crochet pattern for the Fat Bottom Bag. Enjoy all!

Oval Rugs / Doilies

2009-03-18T16:53:00.001-04:00

This is a set of rugs or doilies depending on the thread you use. I would personally make them into bathroom rugs or for the kitchen sink area. Enjoy!

Happenings

2009-03-17T18:14:00.002-04:00

So I am back home and getting my email groups back to regular mail. Come to find out I was released from a group for "no mail" and the other groups I am a member of seem to not be getting my mail or have me set to spam. Gee I feel like I shouldn't bother . So what I don't crochet right now. I am on vacation from it! I think it is just down right pissy to get into a mood because I went away. I think that it was much deserved and damn skippy I am going again in October for another Cruise. I guess I will just have to find new groups to join that are less "moody" and want me for me. Pshaw!

Welcome Home

2009-03-16T16:22:00.006-04:00

Carnival Glory

Oh how the time has flown so fast. I am already back from the Cruise of a lifetime. It seems like forever since I went away.

It was fantastic, Joe and I left a couple days early and stopped at Disney World for a day and drove around Kissimmee and Orlando the other. Saturday morning we headed to the ship and of course boarded it after waiting around for a couple hours. We were so excited to be traveling that we got there a little on the early side. Our trip took us to Cozumel , Belize , Costa Mayo and Nassau. I got to walk a the beach, shop in the little local stores and take tons of pictures. Not to mention made a couple friends while on the ship. I can tell you that I am not happy to be back. I rememebered all the reasons I had wanted to go away. But the nice thing is that we are talking about taking a cruise again closer to Christmas time as a family.

1 Week to Go

2009-02-28T15:06:00.002-05:00

The days don't seem to move fast enough, especially when you know you are going on a dream vacation. I will be leaving March 6th to drive from Indiana to Florida. I am super excited and nothing I do seems to make my days move any faster. At least I know tommorrow will be busy as will Monday. We have errands to take care of . If I had my way we would leave right after the hearing Monday and dally in Orlando. Oh well I am going to find something interesting to do. I should be posting again in a little while. Maybe with something of interest to you all

Toodles

The Vacation of a Lifetime

2009-02-20T20:32:00.002-05:00

You seriously will not believe this but after all the harping and belly aches I get to go on a Vacation. Not just ANY vacation but a Cruise!! Can you believe it. My X (Ron ) paid for it all. Isnt he wonderful!! I will be leaving on March 6th to drive to Orlando Florida for a 7 day Cruise to Mexico, Central America and the Bahamas. I have always always wanted to go abroad and on a boat too. Now I get to do both. I am taking Joe and Ron paid for him as well.
Yes our lives are strange but on some days I would not have it any other way. Yes I will take pictures to share with my fellow Bloggers.
Super happy is the mood. Now if only I would be able to eat with out feeling icky ....At least I will loose weight before we go.
Anyone have formal clothes they can loan to me? I am in need of a formal dress for the trip

Gayle

Vacation or Not To Vacation

2009-02-19T09:24:00.002-05:00

For as long as I can remember ... we have been a econmy income family. Living check to check like so many other people do. After 20 some odd years we took our first vacation in 2006 to Disney World. Now in 2009 I am asking to vacation omce again.
You see I got this notion in my head that I would like to do certain things before I get to "old " to enjoy them or before I die. Which ever comes first. With our budget as it is, anything I choose while it is still winter will be a strain. For instance, we are a large family 6 when you include the spouse I have been separated from. Otherwise 5. I have been talking about Disney again or a cruise for 7 days. Both cost an obscene amount especially for so many people.
My children said "Mom, why don't you go on the cruise with Joe ( boyfriend) and we will go to a theme park during the summer, like Cedar Point" I think that would be awesome. But there is always something trying to keep me here. My mom saying you have house payments to make and cant do anything, stay local. The x spouse who seems to get upset that the funds are shared and he is not going. Mind you he is on probation and can't go with out permission. So I called his probation officer this morning and left a message.
I am destined to go somewhere for a week or so and by golly I will find a way. For now I am selling my crochet items, books, hooks and yarn . This way I have donated funds to the cause.
For now I am going to head back to a cup of coffee and pull out what needs to be Ebayed.

Toodles

EBAY EBAY EBAY!!

2009-02-13T13:53:00.001-05:00

Yes Ladies and Gentleman I am on Ebay again selling crochet related items. I tell you it's a steal of a price that I am offering things at. My goal is to make enough so that the family can go on a trip this summer. Please drop in and help a fellow crocheter out.
My Ebay link is on the side of this page. Seller name is Tempstmoon.
Thanks all for stopping in

Gayle

Items I Won

2009-02-03T12:33:00.002-05:00

On one of the yahoo groups I am on( yep it is a crochet group) I won a contest called "TAG" I was it. The last person who was "it" had to pick someone , make them something and surprise them with a package. Well today the package came to me. 16 dishtowels that were hand crocheted. Perfect for my house and large family. We are always using towels in the kitchen. I was defiantly shocked to have been picked. Now it is my turn to pick someone and make them something special. Here is a picture of what I won...

Bath Rug Completed

2009-01-27T13:51:00.001-05:00

Another one of my favorite patterns. Of course it is written in Portuguese. I made this in one day with a cotton chenille. Took about 12 ounces .

Knitting Needles for Sale on My Ebay

2009-01-26T12:28:00.002-05:00

Just letting you know that I have posted to my Ebay a large collection of Knitting Needles. If you are interested in them please take a look. I will ship them anywhere in the World.

Car Has Been Sold

2009-01-25T15:39:00.000-05:00

Thanks to the internet we finally sold the Dodge Spirit.

Today's Events

2009-01-20T19:43:00.003-05:00

It was one of those days like so many others around here. I went to that place "Dewitt's " that I had mentioned yesterday. What was suppose to be $650 turned out to be $775.25. The owner found anyway to jack up the scooter prices on me. I am tired of doing business with people like him. He wanted to put a lein on my car just so I could get my plates for the year. What a rip off!. Well he is paid off and all the titles are in my possesion now.
On another note. Tomorrow my car is being picked up and the garage will be putting in the new engine. They found me one with 50,000 miles on it. That is wonderful! 10 days and I should have my car back. I will be in a rental for a while. Though I am pondering the rental.
I did see the doctor today and was told I have strained the abdominal wall muscle and also the groin muscle. Makes for painful movement. I won a raffle and another contest and look forward to the prizes. I love little goodies in the mail.
Oh while I am thinking about it. I have a bunch of baby yarn that I would like to sell. Pictures will be posted soon of the yarn.
Anyhow with all that I am off. .... toodles

2009-01-19T22:39:00.002-05:00

Income tax time has rolled in for us. Time to play catch up with the bills and clean out some of the debts that are hindering our daily lives. My scooter for instance, bought from Dewitt's in Anderson. I would not recommend shopping there. I gave the title to my car to the owner as collateral and somehow the bill keeps getting higher and higher. Now he mentions a lein on the car when he is paid monthly. That is a bill that will be paid outright to get him off my back.
My broken car will be fixed hopefully in the next couple weeks. And as for me... I am broken again. Moving furniture by myself, I possibly have 2 new tears (hernia's ). I see the surgeon tomorrow at 1 to find out what is going on. I know one burns and the other is constantly hurting me. We shall see and hopefully he will schedule a time to fix me up. I do hate being broken.

Other then these few things happening. Oh and my conquest of the ripple afghan. I did it and am still doing it. Maybe a month left of crocheting to get it finished.
With this said I shall say good night for now.

Birthday Wishes Do Come True

2009-01-12T14:56:00.003-05:00

I just got this today. A wonderful find and it is one of my birthday presents. this is a 4.5/3 cotton and I love it.

I have always wished for a wall of yarn. Well I redid my craft room and now I have that wall. I am tickled pink over yarn!!

Tapete de Coarao Pattern

2009-01-10T16:09:00.001-05:00

I thought you might like to try something different. I made this with 4/4 cotton and it came out really nice. You can use a heavier yarn and make it a rug. I personally use an H or I hook for items like this. Hope you like it.

2009-01-07T11:06:00.002-05:00

Yep Finally. I can wish my self a Happy Birthday!!

I asked for another birthday wish and it has been fulfilled. There is a yarn I love called 4.5/3 cotton. I found it and was given the ok to purchase cones. I got a couple 8 pounders. WOW that is a lot of crocheting for me. But it makes for the best Doilies and Kitchen items as has a neat texture to it. I LOVE THIS YARN. ... now I need to wait for it to be shipped.. hmph..But I am happy happy so that's all that matters.

2009-01-06T15:40:00.001-05:00

Oval Doily Pattern

2009-01-06T15:38:00.003-05:00

I mentioned a doily I am making, Here is the pattern for you to enjoy.

2 Days till My Birthday.....

2009-01-05T21:43:00.002-05:00

What do I want for my birthday? I am I guess not like most people. I had asked for a shopping spree to a store called Value World. For those of you who do not know this store it is a awesome second hand (Thrift ) store. We have 4 in Indianapolis and I got to shop at them all. Of course I had half off coupons so I spent little and got a lot!
I shopped for myself and my entire family. Even got a large basket of hooks, needles , thread and some yarn .. oh and a couple leaflets.
Joe has offered to bake me a special cake that is delicious and low in sugar. So I wont miss the sweetness of sugar and still get chocolate. Yummy!!
While my birthday is on the 7th we wont be celebrating till this coming weekend. This way we are all home . During the week the family schedule is a mess and it is always difficult to get the entire family at the dinner table at one time.
In the mean time, I am crocheting a doily that I found online from a Brazilian magazine. I will post when it is finished . I am also pondering another afghan but yet to find one that catches my attention. In the mean time I do know a future project is a floor mat from another Portuguese magazine. I love their patterns and wish I could purchase them for my collection. Not to mention the yarns (cotton blends ) they use. Ah a birthday wish...... yarn.... I can wish can't I
I do hope everyone has a great beginning for the New Year to come.
Toodles ,
Gayle

New Years Arrived (whew)

2009-01-04T11:28:00.003-05:00

Well I made it through another year and boy it was a super busy 2008 for myself and family. Christmas was decent and everyone around here was happy. If they weren't for a change they didn't say anything. So all was good.
Since the begining of the New Year I have been back again crocheting. It seems like I actually do this on a daily basis.

Here are just a couple of the items that I have made. and believe me there is more to come.

Oblivious or Just Plain Oblivion..

2008-08-31T22:58:00.000-04:00

I can not actually remember how long it has been since this has all started, the broken cars & houses, moving in and out. All I know is that I am tired and my body hurts all over. When was the last time any of us spoke? A simple "hello" in passing, a phone call to see how each other was doing.. These things I can not recall...
From the moment the sun comes up till almost the time it comes up again I am running, errands, business, fixing something or trying to please someone somewhere. Yet there has not been a single moment in that space for me. Does that sound selfish?
You could say at this point I am beat, washed up and down for the count, yet I am not one to lay down and throw the towel in. " Ding" the next round begins and I am up moving again. Our closing date has moved several times and our Nice ( putting it sarcastically )Seller, is so worried about the money he will pocket , that he forgets that I am his bank or should I say the dollar sign he should be seeing. The date we hope that sticks this time is Sept 12Th. The man who says the house is ready will be here again Tuesday Sept 2ND. Maybe this time all the work will finally be finished. I am sick of maint people running all over the place. Though I am still waiting on the electrician for an outlet to be put into the master bedroom..
I did get a new roof and fresh paint of the 2 car garage this week. FHA said so, so it happened.
I wish they could get my car to work that easy. I had a engine rebuilt and in a matter of 5 minutes that blew up. Broke the cam bearings and now I have to start again. And most people wonder why I am the way I am.
I am looking to trade 2 cars for one. I found the one now to get rid of the other 2 cars. Any takers?
I am off. I have not slept in ages and therefore I am punchy and I would call it slap happy.
Hope you all have it good and have a blessed evening

Gayle

From The Heart

2008-08-08T12:04:00.003-04:00

Dear Lord,
As like so many other days that I pray to you , today I will do so that others may join me in this prayer.
Dear Lord I pray that you Bless me with this loan for the house on 6th street. Bless my family with a place to live and a stress less move. Lord please bless all that read this prayer and grant them a good life and may be have comfort in knowing how much you care for them as you care for us.
Lord please please let my family find peace in knowing we no longer have to worry about being homeless. To finally know the feeling of joy and comfort in your arms.
I love you
Your daughter
Gayle

2008-08-06T17:10:00.003-04:00

Gayle wanted to commit suicide today..
It seems no matter how hard she tries,
nothing she does , comes out the correct way...
From raising her family to buying a house
no matter which direction she goes
there is just no way "right "
Once again they are stuck
with no directional hope
like lost sheep without a shepard
on a long dusty slope..
I tell you this my good man and lady alike
If at all possible She would say Good bye and Good night!!

Life in a Nutt Shell or is it My Hell??

2008-07-28T21:28:00.000-04:00

Good evening everyone, I hope you had nice unevenful days today. I myself wish I could say the same. As you know it being Monday, was the day to find out about the "House". I have been up since 6 am and running pretty much since then. Been on the phone with 4 banks and personally visited 1 twice today. I was called by the Mortgage lender this morning and told that there were several things that needed to be cleared up to make the loan happen. So I scurried up all the funds I could and set off to clear those things up. Mind you most of these were residue's from when my husband and I were first seperated. His depts. I guess he had a credit card that was purged. I settled it for $300.00 and paid half now half on the 3rd after my SSI check comes. Cleared 2 bank accounts that bounced from Gawd knows when totaling almost $270.00 and managed to finally be able to open a bank account with out being prosecuted for check systems. YAY ME!. After doing all this and jumping through every hoop put forth. The realitor calls and wanted to withdrawl the bid. I said no. She calls this afternoon and said that HUD never took the bid either way. So we take it as a no go. It is still listed as open for bidding. I guess we can up our offer. But now the Lender is calling me. I did everything HE said to make the loan happen. Not good enough. I have to have $3000. in the bank ASAP to show I can handle the closing costs and 2 months mortgage so I can have the loan now. Knowing I just paid through the nose all these bills to make the path for the loan. Where on Gods green earth am I going to get the "gift" of $3000.00 . The Lender said "Gift" I can rebid on the house but I need the "gift" .. If someome knows where the "gift" is. Please let me know. As I can not find it. I can not manage to make it happen. There is nothing left here not even food to eat. I have sold it all to do what I have and sold things I should not have to get what I did. Lord Help me I did what I could. .
So.. I guess after the Fire Marshall is done with the house we are in.. we are going to be sooo homeless it is will be not even worth our sanity. I can say I tried. I failed but at least I tried. I feel for my family and for dragging those I love with me into this mess.
Thanks everyone for the prayers you gave us. They all were deeply moving and loved by each.
~ huggles~
Gayle

To The 4th~ Cheers~

2008-07-04T22:29:00.003-04:00

You now, it is the 4th.. of July. Pretty much everyone is out enjoying themselves and I am here writting this. I can hear the fireworks going off down the street at the race track and have no interest in seeing them. What is wrong with me?? I must be bogged down with issues. Yep that is it. I am seriously unhappy these days. I can remember a time when little presents were a norm. Not anymore, at least not in a long time.. I miss those days. I remember when I was considered beautiful and felt that way deep inside. Not anymore. I do not even have a reason to get dressed these days. Unless it is to head out to Walmart for groceries. I guess it is just how I took the cards that were dealt to me in life and I guess I excepted them or else I would have never taken them. But I do miss being a someone . I feel like a no one in a no where place. Nothing has been fixed that is broken and still sitting in the idle position of life not knowing if I am coming or going. Worse I am taking everyone down with me. . Sucks doesn't it??
One of my children has plans to move out soon , I can see it. She is 17. I wonder if she will finish school. I hope so. But I doubt it. She is choosing a path I tried to teach her to stay away from. Does this mean I failed? Or did she fail to listen? ~ shrugs~ I am off to make someones life as miserable as mine or make theirs better by seeing how blah anothers can be...
Happy 4th Everyone!!

The Jist of Things....

2008-06-27T05:28:00.003-04:00

Some of you might be able to relate to what I have to say and I can imagine there will be others who have never known what it has been like to deal with the issues at hand. Well my life has not been easy and of late it has been what I would call pretty darn hard.
At some point I might ramble so please forgive me. This post will be rather long.

I am a mom who cares for 3 children one who is 17 2 who are 13 and 14. I have a man who is disabled and unemployed pending Social Security ( no income ) I have a Spouse whom I have been separated from since July of 2005 who helps me by sharing each paycheck with me weekly so I can get by. By no means would I call him a dead beat. Though he can be a pain in my ass.

Since 2007 I have moved over 5 times and through 3 states to land here in Anderson, Indiana. Why here? Because my mother is here and she gave me the "I am getting old and want my children closer speech" not to mention I was told I was very ill with cancer. ( I was misdiagnosed) but that is another story )... So I'm here paying way to much rent for a house in a very poor area. Most of the houses are falling over or are closed down. But I had hope when I moved into this one. The Owner wanted to sell. But he is asking way way to much money. We managed to talk him down from $60,000 to $40,000 but the area the most expensive house here is under $30,000.
I have terrible credit so I asked my mom's soon to be husband to help me and he is considering it. Had me do all the leg work and now the code enforcer is coming to look at the house because there are several violations .. like pane windows versus opened windows. Like in the master bedroom. Hence I get no fresh air at night plus it is a fire hazard. One reason why I am not sleeping. It is always hot in there even with a fan. My living room has one window and it is a pane glass window as well. No ceiling fan just a floor fan I bought and the front door. Very hot in there too . My daughters bedroom is a interior room. No windows at all just a door. Fire hazard.... The wiring to the house is not up to code. like wires are hanging out of the ceiling. My heating coils are showing in the bathroom because plaster came down. All these things the landlord knows. Mind you I have 3 outlets in the kitchen that do not work and 2 support the frig, freezer and what would be an ac unit. That he wont let me put in his window, The only one in the house downstairs that could be used.. And its in the mudd room.... This really stresses me out.
Now my car.. I paid someone who is reputable over $1200 which included all the parts. Oh and a dell computer that is still under warranty also.. to work on my car and rebuild my engine. He even had Joe assist him the entire job. Come to find out he did not put in Lock tight and probably several other small things. Now the car is a mess again and the engine wont run over 20 mph. It's gonna cost me all over the place again.
Ok so these are every day issues for me and I deal with it. But what gets me is the children.. they know I am under a terrible strain here trying to acquire a home so my rent/mortgage would be lower then $600. a month as that is what I pay now. (My ssi is $637) Keep in mind I support 5 total plus the x's help to keep it going here... all the bills too..Joe chips in and gives his welfare check and food stamps to cover what he can.
I give everything and above, clothing , personal needs, gas, insurance, repairs, mom can I have a dollar for a pop please... all of that stuff is on me.
As I was saying... the kids.. My 17 year old has forgotten that I am her mother and figures she is moving out when she turns 18 next April. She is still in 10th grade. I talk to her till I am blue in the face about a life better then mine , tech school if not collage. She hangs out with a boy who has been locked up more times then I can count and has issues.. big issues. He even told her that he would kill their child if it was born handicapped. She wants this???? OMG but what am I to do.
My 13 year old thinks that coming in the house at 10:30 is to early and wants to run the streets. Threatens me all the time to take off, Tells me I am good for nothing. Reminds me how poor I am and brings me to tears every day. She like all the others I have to fight with to do a simple anything around here. I have no self worth if I have no money for them.. at least the younger 2.
Now th 14 year old, He is Joe's son. I did not birth him. He came with his father. I will be honest. I wish he did not come. I ask him to do something and usually it is done half assed. He argues with me all the time and belittles his father almost every time he talks to him. He makes him sound like he is my puppet. "Oh you gonna have me do this cause SHE said to?" I have reminded him that I support him because his father can not. He does not care. I am a worthless piece of shit. Why is it that I have to stand for this. His father and I at piece when they are not here. But when the children the younger ones I mean are afoot. He and I are at war. No peace and I do not know what to do about it. Every little thing seems like a big thing. no privacy for us because someone in the house is fighting over something or always at my bedroom or office door for something stupid.
I Pray every day for help, because I am not making it, barely... my sanity is slipping as well as the basic comforts of life, food clothing... it is almost impossible to get by . I NEED SLEEP!!
We wont even touch the subject of the outside family's yet as they are upsetting at times to and add to the issues...if only I could concentrate on my crochet... I can't.. Someone send a Miracle please I really need one terribly

Father's Day Rain Show

2008-06-16T08:40:00.004-04:00

Father's day... Somewhat quiet.... We had a wonderful storm. I must say that where we live in Indiana there is some great weather. Lightening to me is beautiful, Can sit there for hours and watch it. The rumble is soothing, reminding me of the low pipes of a motorcycle... Yes friends if you have been there then you know what I mean... But after the storms, sometimes we are gifted with a rainbow. Last night was one of those moments. Right before the sun had gone for the evening the rainbow surfaced. These are those moments caught on a digi for you .

An Acomplishment

2008-06-16T08:36:00.002-04:00

It seems like forever that I have tried to crochet a pineapple and failed. Well in the midst of the madness that has been going on around here I have conquered the pineapple. It is not a fancy one at that but the beginning . I am proud, prouder so as my Jennifer asked for it so that it may rest in her room. Here is what it looks like

The Saga Continues.....

2008-06-15T08:09:00.002-04:00

Well as I stand here ready to pull my hair out.... my car is once again broken. Yesterday I had my water pump replaced and now the car is making the same noises it did when the engine had to be replaced. So today and tomorrow they are tearing apart the engine again to see what the HELL is the matter with the car. The speculation is that a a lifter might have come loose. I hope this is not going to get costly . I have been selling a few things that I should not be selling. Since I can not get any outside help I do what I must, even if it is sort of in that gray area....
I have not heard anything about the purchase of the house yet, I figure they are waiting to find out about the inspection that will take place in a couple weeks. Everyone here is on edge and it is like the air is charged with static. Joe and I barely talk, I am super stressed, had thought to quit smoking , did so for 2 days and personally think now is not the right time to try that. I think Joe feels the same way. Mind you he and I do not have the issues, it is the kids, the never leave us alone, always bitching about something and never listening and doing everything they are suppose to half assed. Then wonder why they get grounded.. go figure.
We try not to discuss Erie.. We always fight when that comes up. He knows how I feel about it. I respect the ideals of visiting his Grand as she is getting up there.. but lets say we are not going to touch this topic unless you want a good cat fight.. and I will bring the claws!!
So needless to say, today is going to be a day like all others, we live , breath and deal with unruley children. Oh and btw.. Happy Fathers Day to all you dads out there... I know somewhere mine is lurking , shame I never knew him though.....
So I am off to cuppa land, a shower some crochet and a big fat stoggie!!

Does it Ever End???

2008-06-09T07:10:00.003-04:00

I would love to say that I have good new, but I don't.
Let me catch you up on what has been happening in our little world here in Anderson Indiana... in Feb of this year we moved into what we thought was going to be the perfect house.... I tell you if we ever had back luck with houses.....
So Friday after several letters and phone calls to the landlord.. Why? Well when we moved in the back end of the kitchen/ mudd room only one outlet worked out of 3. We have a freezer and frig sharing a power strip there. because of that. The landlord was suppose to have someone come out and fix it quickly so that we would not overload that plug. That never happened.
With that in mind. The living room has 1 window and it is a large pane of glass and can not be opened. With the weather being hot the room gets no air. The master bed room is the same way. So I called him and asked if it would be any way possible to maybe change those to windows that opened. We can not even put air conditioners in 1, because the windows do not open. 2 because the only window that does open downstairs has no outlet as he never fixed it and it already had the freezer and frig on it. So he calls me back Friday and says I will consider giving you 2 windows that open if you give me $300 more towards your sec deposit making it a total of $900. and also a 2 year lease instead of one year with of course a raise in rent. I already pay $600. and live in $637 a month. How can I manage that??. I had someone who knows houses come and do a walk through of the house.. why you say? Because the landlord said unless I give him the money he will not fix the electric or do the windows. my only other option is to buy the house.
Fine so This person does the walk through to asses the property. It needs a roof, not to mention baby birds living between the roof and ceiling upstairs. ( that's a no no ). faulty wiring( not up to code ) another no no.. how about mold in the basement ( oh my big health hazard there ) I could go on and on. I was advised of my rights and told what I need to do for my safety and protection. As for relocation, I have nothing to make that happen. My mother is trying to help me once again. But this time I am looking to purchase a home that is a fixer upper so I can sink my income into that instead of dealing with all these dead beat landlords. I will say I am taking financial donations from any and all at this point.We really like this neighborhood and all of us have made friends here. There are a bunch of homes that are empty so.. the hunt begins again...
I am trying to keep a grip on this all. Joe and I went to the docs last week. They want to change his insulin as the one he has been using is not keeping his sugars down, neither is the fact that he wont eat right and he is smoking cigars like a Russian race horse because of his stress levels. but then I am smoking them to now. I have been told that for the past month I have had high blood pressure and they gave me a month to bring it down or I get medication for it when we go back for a follow up appoint.
He is happy about riding his Bike, it is our only peace, My car.. I want to beat it to death. It is down again!!a water pump or the catalytic converter is bad, not sure which or both yet. So we are usually on the bike or home. My moms car that we were using is being used elsewhere for now... I can't sleep so here I write, have not been crocheting because I am usually hurting to much. But I am breathing so that makes it good. I am off for some coffee.. Have a good day and one for us too

You want Updates.. You're Gonna Get Them!

2008-06-01T10:35:00.002-04:00

Where shall I begin?

Hmmm.. I will tell you that of late I have not been in the greatest of moods. I was but that seems to be gone now.

Where and why....

I paid, yep all on me , as always.. Gayle paid to get the motorcycle fixed and insured and tittled. It is up and running. But this time my name is on the ownership papers. Now if god for bid something happened to the original owner no one can take it and sell it. I will be the fall back owner. And why not. I pay for it.

The doctor decided I needed to be put back on a medication that caused me to need to wear glasses but I must have my eyes checked ever few months now for eye pressure . To assure them I have no stages of glacoma. How sweet of them. So until they get the dose back up I am a misserable bitch and irritable. That is putting it nicely!

The good things. I am mentoring several children ( teens) in our area. I have 1 that pretty much lives with us. Can you believe he doesmore then Joe's son and never complains about anything. His father knows he is here and I want to adopt him. HE is 15 and is wonderful. I made him an afghan. He always makes me feel wanted. Betweeen all the children I have to care for.. they just suck. The children that I mentor. Everyday they tell my kids.. all 3 that they have it great here and should want to help and be greatful for what they have. The neighborhood children have little. Some have had parents pass, little food, not even a bed to sleep on. Parents who drink way to much, drugs or pop pills.

Why I mentor, Because these children remind me that I did not fail as a parent.

I have decided that I will not be traveling with dead baggage anymore. We have spoken on this and it has been decided that if there is not a change then 2 will be leaving here to make their own path.

I can not support a child who uses me for food and living supplies and then insists that I am no better then his natural mother who abused him. I have never lifted a finger towards him and always have given him the best I can. Even my own girls are like this. But their father is not goin gto care for them so it is my job to look out for my own girls as I am their mother. Maybe it will change but for now...

I try to make everyone happy. I am miserable. Oh I bought a trampoline and 2 large tents to for everyone. you think they appericiate it? NOT.... I have been crocheting skater hats I will show you who liked them. Guess what it was not my kids. These are pictures of the neighborhood children. They are the ones who wanted and earned them. My kids had no interest.

On a NOTE. ANGEL has been the BETTER of all THREE

Hook Holders for Your Crochet Items

2008-05-22T16:47:00.004-04:00

Need something to hold your hooks in? Here is a perfect idea. Compact, this holder will fit nicely into a bag and keep all your Crochet items in one place. I make these in various patterns Which of course depends on the material that is available at the time. If interested please email me at Flametide@aol.com and put in the subject line Hook Holders. I sell these for $4.75 plus shipping. Yeppers I will ship anywhere there is a post man delivering.
Thanks for looking at my blog

Gayle

Still Standing....

2008-05-13T19:08:00.002-04:00

As you can see I am still standing... Once again I feel the need to apologize for not being online much or really posting. To be honest with you I have not felt really well and the mood has not put me here much. I have not crocheted anything in days. Between my eyes bothering me and my temperment being short, nothing has gotten finished around here.
The dog that has adopted us has become a pain in my rear. I seriously prefer cats. He keeps eatting my silk flowers, digs holes in the front yard. (landlord will have a shit fit soon) And I still refuse to pay more monthly for something almost the same size as my cat.
My car is up and running but has a couple bugs to work out yet.
Mothers day would have been better if it never came. I got no peace and still had a housefull of everyone elses kids. Nope nothing came my way, not even sleep. Can't report a mothersday gift either. Usual day here. I got alot of bitching from everyone and when I went to have my turn got the " everyone sure complains alot around here" . Typical men!!
Been to way to many doctors to be told nothing. I have nerve entrapment. Yep We knew this. Nothing can be done, was told to deal with it and gave me some pills. Eyes... rest them and deal with the rollar coaster effect. My brain will not except the ideal of glasses let alone bifocals so I have migranes and am dizzy . Doc said just have to get used to it and teach the brain to accept them. Yeah right!
Other then the usual BS I am good, alive and breathing. When I can get my eyes to like me I should be here more... crochet more... be at peace. for the moment I have mentioned to those who can and want to .. call. it is easier then reading the screen.
I am off now as my brain is going WEEEE and that is not a good thing

Miss you all
Gayle

All About Buckets

2008-04-20T10:36:00.002-04:00

Here is something else I just completed. It is a various collection of buckets. I used 2 strands of 4 ply cotton to make these sturdy and a size G hook. I scaled down for the little ones as these are all more or less from the single pattern. If you would like this.. get in touch with me. I can share the pattern for you crocheters or make you buckets. Either way works for me.

Have a great day!

Crocheting in The Sun

2008-04-20T10:32:00.002-04:00

As you can see, I have been busy once again crocheting. But then most would say that is a "given". Here are 3 -12 point ripples I have made into doilies. I used a 4 ply cotton thread and a size G crochet hook.

Lost in Oblivion....

2008-04-06T17:08:00.002-04:00

How do I breathe when Oblivion is all I see?
Lost in the translucent side of the world. Not dawn or dusk.. Simply Oblivion...
I seem to be standing on the treheshold of what we call life, yet through the door I can not pass.
I wonder endlessly as to what I did to falter, for such forthcomings to fall upon me. Forever wondering when will my living hell pass......

Another Creation

2008-03-30T17:48:00.003-04:00

I have been surfug the web, looking for something different. Well I found this pattern in Porteguise and with the help of the symbols I managed to crochet this little item. I did change the original pattern by omiting several inner rounds and adding a few more outter. Also, the material I used is 100% chenille bulky cotton and a I crochet hook. This rug is machine washable but I would dry flat if possible.

Wanting to Trade

2008-03-30T15:02:00.002-04:00

I am looking for crochet books / magazines / leaflets from other countries. Such as Brazil, Russia, France, Japan and Portigual. I have many Old / Vintage leaflets / books dating from the 1940's - to late 1950's. I do hope there is someone out here that reads this and is willing to swap.

I have a desire to crochet items that are not readily found in the United States. If anyone can help please email me at Flametide@aol.com . Put in the subject line "Trade" .

Thank you all for the help in locating such items

Gayle

On A Mission...

2008-03-28T19:10:00.002-04:00

It's me again, been here all day lurking as I have been on a mission. Last night a partner in crime and I stayed up surfing the net and I decided that I needed to learn symbol crochet. You see there are tons of wonderful patterns that are not from the US. If only to read and understand them. The quality is better or shall I say I believe. So after searching for patterns, I found a symbol crochet that I figured I would try, the back up on it . It is in Porteguese so either way I will have to understand or fail. This is what the pattern looks like.. This is my finished project and yes I did it ALL today. I am so proud of myself~ pats own back~ I accomplished something I had wanted to.

THIS IS THE PATTERN

THIS IS THE FINISHED PRODUCT

As you can see by the hook it is a nice size.
Just wanted to share in my first baby steps of crocheting

Gayle

Ebaying Again

2008-03-25T18:01:00.002-04:00

Please come check me out on EBAY. I am selling spools of 100% cotton yarn and many craft items as well as non-craft items. You will be glad you did!!
eBay Seller: tempstmoon: Crocheting, Yarn items on eBay.com

Couple More Bags

2008-03-25T17:55:00.002-04:00

These bags are excellent for shopping. Ideal for replacing those plastic bags the stores give you . If you have heard of Aldi's food store you know they charge you for bags. This eleminates that by reusing and washing, these bags can last a very long time. Double lined for thickness . Another good use. Trick or Treating, no more pillow cases or torn bags, Hold your bounty in one of these special made bags. Bag takes 1 yard of outter shell and 1 yard of lining.
Asking $8.25 each ( Mostly to cover material expenses ). Email me for questions. I do ship all over the world
Thanks again
Gayle

The New You in Shopping Bags!!

2008-03-20T19:30:00.002-04:00

Playing around with material today, had to take off from crocheting. A person can only twit and turn so much. I have made these 2 great grocery type bags. They resemble a walmart bag but are washable and durable. Perhaps I will sell these too.. haven't decided yet. Want info email me Flametide@aol.com ...

Croaker Hook Size J

2008-03-19T22:45:00.003-04:00

Joe cleaned a piece of branch for me and left me to my own accord. This is my first try at making my own crochet hook. Isn't it lovely? On the end hangs a cute little froggy that dangles as you hook.. Hence Croaker....

When The Music Begins and The Dancing Stops

2008-03-19T19:25:00.002-04:00

Sitting here listening to music... I wonder where my dance partner has gone. What seems to be many moons from this moment have disappeared. The dancing has ended , but the music still plays on. I wonder what has happened that the motion stopped. The splendor of a couples sinews glimmering in the twilite....has faded away like that of a dream state awakening to the feeling of emptiness...